FLORENCE, AZ. Courageous ICE agents were left shaking, after a close encounter with violent undocumented children, which lead to their eventual capture. An ICE official commended the agents for their valiant efforts, highlighting the threat posed by the assailants, “These children are rapists, they’re murderers, and some, I assume, are good children.” For the safety of the ICE agents, the children were locked in cages and separated from their families. One ICE agent broke down in tears after the incident, stating, “When you’re out there, exposed to all these dangerous children, you realize that the only thing that matters is protecting your brothers in the field of deportation.” Overcome with sobs, another ICE agent patted his back and elaborated, “Here at ICE, we’re a family, and you protect your family. You never let anything bad happen to your family. I just couldn’t stand to see one of these bastard children take out one of my brothers.” A third ICE agent patted his back as he started to cry, “Shhh,” he comforted, “those mean children are locked away and will never hurt anyone again.”
James P. W. Martin 