INT. BRENDON’S HOUSE – DAY
Brendon walks in the front door.
BRENDON
Mom, I’m home! Coach wasn’t feeling well, or something, so practice was canceled! Mom?
Brendon looks around the house until he finds his mom, Paula, in her room, dressed up and putting on makeup.
BRENDON
Mom?
PAULA
Oh, Brendon, I didn’t think you’d be home.
BRENDON
Yeah, practice was canceled.
PAULA
Well don’t you have friends to play with in the basement?
BRENDON
No, Melissa’s having an episode and Jason’s still embarrassed about what he did to Dad’s suit.
PAULA
Dad’s suit? Brendon, you father hasn’t lived here for years, he didn’t leave a suit here.
BRENDON
Well then whose suit was hanging up in your closet?
PAULA
Maybe we should talk.
BRENDON
What? Mom, what are you-
PAULA
You see, Brendon, sometimes Mommies see other people after they get divorced.
BRENDON
What? No, no, no, no, no. No! Bad! That’s a bad Mommy!
PAULA
And he’s on his way over to pick up his suit.
BRENDON
Gasp! I can’t believe you would lie to me like this!
PAULA
Brendon, I never lied to you.
BRENDON
Yes you did! You’re sneaking around with other people and never told me! That’s the same as lying.
PAULA
Would you just hear me out?
BRENDON
And what was he wearing if he didn’t have the suit on, Mom?
PAULA
Brendon.
BRENDON
Oh my god, I think I’m going to throw up. What? Did he just go home naked after he was done being naked all over you?
Brendon starts dry heaving.
PAULA
I didn’t lie to you, Brendon. I just always happened to see him while you were at school, or soccer practice, or in the basement, and it just never came up. You see, that’s not a lie, Brendon, it’s a misunderstanding in communication.
BRENDON
You are a tricky Mommy. Now I know where I get it from.
PAULA
So you said the suit needs to be dry cleaned again?
BRENDON
Or burned.
PAULA
It’s that bad, huh?
BRENDON
Have you seen how much Jason sweats? I think he has a problem.
PAULA
Alright, I’ll call Tony and tell him not to come.
BRENDON
No, bring Tony over, Mom, I want to meet Tony. Heh. Tony, my white whale.
PAULA
Brendon, what does that mean?
BRENDON
If you don’t get it, you don’t get it.
PAULA
No, I think I do get it and that’s why it worries me. It makes me think you’re going to try to harpoon him with scissors or something.
BRENDON
Hey that’s a good idea, I was just going to pour a cup of coffee on his head.
FADE TO BLACK.
James P. W. Martin 